Today would have been my Father’s 80th Birthday. That’s hard to even comprehend, because when he left us thirty-eight years ago he was the forty-two year old daddy of two daughters and five sons, ages ranging from sixteen (me) to age three. I write this as a tribute to him and as a reminder to me.
The first words of the Book of Mormon are these. “I, Nephi, having been born of goodly parents, therefore I was taught somewhat in all the learning of my father…” Nephi credits his parents with laying his educational and spiritual foundation. I believe that this is no truer for Nephi than it is for me. My time with my father was cut short. My father was a brilliant scientist and a well-read student of the gospel. He died when I was only sixteen years old. How can I possibly say that I was taught somewhat in all the learning of my father?
I guess that the most instructive word in this sentence is, “somewhat.” It means “to a considerable degree, significantly.” My father’s legacy of learning, passed to me, truly was complete. Not that my head is full of all the facts and figures and understandings that comprise the body of his knowledge. No, that is not it at all.
What my father passed on to me is three fold. During his lifetime he had learned that the three most important things in life are God, Family, and Country. He truly qualifies as a goodly parent even though he left me early in my life, because he gave me a love for learning in these significant areas of life.
He showed me by example what it looks like to put God first and to love the word of God and His restored gospel. I saw him get out of his bed and bend his cancer-ridden body before the Lord in prayer time and time again. The gospel was what he loved to discuss. We have been commanded to talk of Christ and to rejoice in Christ, and “talk of” and “rejoice in” he did. This is not common in today’s world and I am most grateful for his example.
My father valued his family. It was important to him that we be given truth. He was never too tired to explain Heavenly Father’s plan one more time to a frightened little child (me) who could not sleep. Family night and family scripture study were important to him and were carried out before most of the church even attempted that challenge.
When I say he loved his country he did, but when I think of the love of my father for “land” I don’t just mean our homeland. My dad was a scientist because he loved the whole earth and everything therein. He was curious about everything from the tallest mountain to the tiniest electron.
Several summers ago I had the experience of being reminded of this inheritance as I stood with my children in the California home I grew up in and in the classroom where my father taught chemistry until he died. It was wonderful to share the past with my family, but to me it was more than that. I stood in these sweet places of my past, surrounded by memories, with tears rolling down my cheeks. I believe that it was a reminder of who I am and where I come from. I am not the scholar my dad is but I love the things he loved and I hate the things he hated. I think that means I was taught somewhat (significantly) in all the learning of my father.
Nephi says that he was born of “goodly parents,” of a goodly father and mother, “therefore [he] was taught somewhat in all the learning of his father.” The greatest gift a child can receive is the like-mindedness of his or her parents in regard to what needs to be taught. I was given this blessing. It turned out to be very significant in the lives of my brothers and sister and I that my mother was “goodly” because we lost our father to cancer at the age of forty-two. It is a wonder to me that though my father was there and my mother was here, the goodly teaching in word and example went on and still goes on today. The diffusion of the learning of my father with my mother as chief agent is a divine example of the goodly parents principle.
If we are to progress in this life it is important to be very aware of the truth the “goodly” have passed to us. We are not our own, and the truth we have inherited is not our own. I thank my goodly parents with all my heart for their unified, un-disrupted teaching.
In the fellowship of recovery we come to the challenge of teaching, or carrying the message to others when we get to Step 12. Our family backgrounds are not the same. Some of us have had very difficult lives as children and as parents. As a result of applying these 12 Steps to our lives many of us are just now coming to understand what is most important. I believe that the transformation in our lives today shines a very bright light on what we now desire to pass along to future generations. I want to remember that in only sixteen short years my dad was able to teach his young daughter what was most important to him. I’ve more than tripled my age since then, but what he taught me still really matters. I testify that it’s never too early to teach “somewhat” and it’s absolutely never too late either!
Happy Birthday Dad!
By Nannette W.
Posted Friday, January 23, 2009
Copyright 2008 by Nannette W.
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Frederick says
Nannette,I appreciate your insights and have learned much from you. Thanks for being inspirational in my life.Boyd
janhad3 says
Thanks for sharing, Nannette. That was a beautiful tribute. I, too, lost my dad when I was a teenager – he was in a car accident. In 18 years with him, I also was taught “somewhat” many truths and things to appreciate in life. It’s always good for me to remember how much my dad loved (loves) me and the things he wanted me to learn.
Jen says
Happy Birthday Grandpa Buddy!!! Thanks for the tears mom (this one made me tear up) and for passing on your memories of Grandpa to us! It will be a wonderful reunion in Heaven!
Kenj and Nate says
Happy birthday grandpa also, I can’t wait to meet this wonderful man. You made me cry.